 郵件開頭 為保持結構上的清晰、簡潔，方便收件人快速獲取郵件的主要信息，商務電子郵件的開頭部分不宜過長，以3~4行為宜。寫開頭部分時，可參照以下三種形式。 1. 直接點出郵件主旨。 一般而言，西方人喜歡開門見山的表達方式，因此他們常在郵件的開頭部分直接點出郵件主旨。常見的直接表達郵件主旨的句型如下。 ● With reference to the proposal, I would like to ... ● I am writing because … ● I am writing about … ● I wish to apologize/invite/complain … ● I am very pleased/delighted to recommend … 2. 先提及與收件人之前的溝通情況(包括發郵件、發傳真、打電話或見面等)，然后再點出郵件主旨。 這種形式在商務電子郵件的開頭部分比較常見，常用的句型如下。 ● Further to our telephone call/meeting this morning, I am attaching/sending … ● Thank you for your fax/email/letter/inquiry/order … Now I am pleased to confirm … ● It was a/my great pleasure to talk to you/meet you/receive … Now I am pleased to inform you that … 3. 先簡要介紹寫信人自身的情況或與郵件主旨相關的信息，然后再點出郵件主旨。 這種形式通常適用于首次進行商務溝通的人之間。具體來說，寫信人需要介紹的內容大體分為三類：①介紹自身的情況(如姓名、工作地點、職位等)；②說明自己是如何獲取收信人的信息(如姓名、郵件地址等)的；③介紹與郵件主旨相關的信息。下面舉例說明這一形式常用的句型。 ● I would like to introduce myself. My name is Michael Lee, and I work as an engineer at HDC. I have been appointed to be your service engineer with immediate effect (即時生效). ● We have learnt from our factory in Ningbo City that you are looking for a supplier of paint brushes (油漆刷). As we have been dealing in (經營) this line for more than 30 years, we would like to enter into a business relationship with you. ● On Saturday, 3rd March, I bought a BX Mountain bike from your shop. Since then I have had to return it eight times for repairs. I wish to apply for a replacement from you. 上述三種形式在商務電子郵件中都比較常見。無論采用哪種形式開篇，寫信人都應盡量言簡意賅地點出郵件主旨。 郵件結尾 商務電子郵件的結尾部分應力求簡練，避免與上文的內容出現重復。在寫這一部分內容時，寫信人應注意措辭禮貌得體，語調積極樂觀，盡量給收件人留下良好的印象。商務電子郵件常見的結尾方式有三種：①要求對方采取行動；②表示自己可以為對方提供幫助或反饋意見等；③感謝對方提供的幫助，或期待與對方開展合作。下面筆者一一介紹。 1. 要求對方采取行動。 這是商務電子郵件比較常見的結尾方式，通常要求收件人盡早采取行動，包括答復寫信人的郵件、確認相關信息(如交貨、付款等內容信息)等。以下為要求對方采取行動的常用句型。 ● I am looking forward to your early reply. ● I am looking forward to meeting you soon. ● I would appreciate it very much if you could confirm the order ... ● I would be grateful if you could make the payment by the end of ... 2. 表示自己可以為對方提供幫助或反饋意見等。 為了保持與收件人更為順暢的溝通和合作，寫信人有時會在郵件結尾表明自己愿意為對方提供幫助，或聲明自己會針對某一問題及時作出反饋。以這種方式結尾的常用句型如下。 ● If you need any more information, please feel free to contact me. You can reach me on my direct line: 86-21-53456677. ● I will call you next Tuesday to discuss this matter. ● We will give you a reply immediately after reviewing your proposal. 3. 感謝對方提供的幫助，或期待與對方開展合作。 在商務郵件的結尾，若無其他需要強調的實質性內容，寫信人通常會采用這種方式來對對方提供的幫助表示感謝，或表示期待與對方開展進一步的合作。以這種方式結尾的常用句型如下。 ● I really appreciate your cooperation in solving this problem. ● We would be extremely pleased to have you as a regular customer. ● I am looking forward to cooperating with you. ● We are looking forward to providing our service for you at an early date. 案例分析 下面我們以一封英文商務電子郵件為例，來具體分析撰寫英文商務電子郵件常出現的問題和應注意的事項。 Dear Peter, Mr. Jackson, our eBusiness Department head, will visit the Beijing subsidiary of ABC on April 12. He will hold a meeting regarding eBusiness communication and coordination between all ABC subsidiary companies. The estimated time for this meeting is two hours. I would like to set up this meeting with you: please confirm your availability for this date and time. Please also give me the names and phone numbers of anyone from your staff who you feel will benefit from this meeting. Your prompt reply would be appreciated. Best regards, Jack Lee ABC Building Shanghai 這封郵件的作者是某外企總公司商務部的一名助理。他寫信的目的是通知北京分部的相關人士與他一起安排在北京分部召開的一次關于電子商務溝通的會議。上海總公司的電子商務部經理將出任會議主持人，并作一個主題演講。寫信人希望收件人確認會議的具體時間以及參會人員名單。這封郵件主要存在以下兩個問題。 1. 沒有在開頭點出郵件主旨。 通過上述的介紹可知，這封郵件的核心內容是想通知北京分部的相關人士與寫信人一起安排會議。但該郵件并沒有在開頭部分將這一主旨點出來，而是先介紹了一些次要信息。這一寫法也體現了中西方的思維差異。根據美國學者Kaplan的調查，西方人的思維呈直線型，在進行語言表達時，他們喜歡直截了當、直奔主題，常采用先總后分、先重要后次要的表達方式；而東方人的思維呈螺旋型，在進行語言表達時，他們則比較委婉、含蓄，一般不直入主題，多采用先分后總、先次要后重要的表達方式。認識到中西方的這種思維和表達差異，我們在寫英文郵件時就應該克服中式思維的影響，努力使自己的表達符合英文習慣。具體到這篇郵件中，寫信人應該在郵件開頭直接點出主旨。 2. 開頭段落囊括了所有的信息點，層次混亂。 這封郵件的層次比較混亂，全文沒有區分開頭、主體和結尾段，而是將所有的信息都堆在了第一段中，容易給收件人造成閱讀和理解障礙。另外，這篇郵件除了交代上文提到的核心內容外，還介紹了幾點與會議相關的其他信息，包括會議的目的、主持人等。寫信人在開頭點明主旨后，應將這些相關信息放在主體段進行分段論述，以使郵件的結構更清晰，意思更明了。 郵件修改 Subject: Scheduling a Meeting in Beijing Dear Peter, I’m writing to set up a two-hour meeting with you in Beijing from 9:00 to 11:00 am on April 12. The purpose of the meeting is better e-business communication and coordination between all ABC subsidiaries. Mr. Jackson, our E-business Department head, will come to Beijing to host the meeting and also make a presentation on the subject. If you feel any of your staff will benefit from the presentation and would like to attend, please send me their names and phone numbers. Please confirm whether you are available at the suggested date and time. I am looking forward to your prompt reply. Best regards, Jack Lee ABC Building Shanghai |
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